+ INNER UNIVERSE +
A cruel fairytale from Wonderland Overdrive
planning & presented by MadHatter - all rights reserved
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~ Thanks to Sarah who betareaded it :) 

«I am called... called at night
spirits rising, calling
To remain with you longer
Calling falling if you remember me
I'll remain with you longer
Don't worry, Aeria Gloris...»
Yoko Kanno, "Inner Universe"


What's life? Do you think this is life? I don't care. Life is only a word.
I've heard people say that their deepest dream is to be happy. To live happily with the people they love. So, I ask you… is that the true meaning of life? To seek love? To reach one's desire? 
People say that life is hard, but all the pain is necessary to reach one's dreams. As if pain is the inevitable, dark side of life.
That's a stupid lie.
Who would suffer pain intentionally? 

I don't want to stay here. There's nothing I need here. This place is only a big, endless cage that keeps me from you. It's a cage without bars, this place that surrounds me. I don't want to suffer anymore. Life, this life, hurts, 'cause you're not here with me.

[I see in the window's glass… a pair of eyes. Amber eyes, so sad. 
Why did you give me these, Mommy?
She laughed.
'Cause you're mine', she said. 'Only mine, unlike everyone else.']

Then, she came here. She claimed to be our mother… stupid liar. You're not my mother. You're not her. Your existence is meaningless to me. 
But she is Mommy's child. So I'm her brother?

You're not like her. 

She thinks we're a part of her… that's only a point of view. I hate you, stupid girl, 'cause it's your fault Mommy left me alone. So, since you're a part of me… if I killed you, I'd reach her? If I killed you, I'd be able to kill myself?

The sky is like a deep, orange ocean, still and endless. The same sun, everyday, again and again. Time doesn't want anything to change, but people are still living, still changing. 
All of them. They behave like they've forgotten everything… 
They are acting. 
I can see it in their eyes, what's on their minds. The past is alive, every single aspect of it, every single thing. The world is not as it was. They know that things have changed, but… they've adjusted to it, flowingly. They've had something else to care about. 
[A soft voice, in the depths: they have a life.]

I don't. 
I have lost everything.

You're searching for a reflection that cannot come back to you, to hear it say how much it loves you.

They think of me as a child. They're right. I'm a child and my eyes are pure. They would be surprised if they knew I'm able to read all the deepest emotions of their minds… 
Again, it's only a point of view. Immature people. They don't want to face their lives, they lie to themselves, pretend not to know their true desires. 
Who's the child, then?
I see a love that fears its own strength. I see a weakness which hides itself in coldness and presumption. Far away, I see a little pain, and its name is "other than me".
They tease me 'cause I know perfectly well what I want.
Only one thing.
I want her here with me again. 

My cruel little child. 

I want to hear your voice again…

The sky turned a deep shade of grey. The sun vanished, suddenly, as if it had never existed. The sky was cloudy, like her face. Drops, I saw. What are these… these…
Rain?
'I like its sound,' she said, in a quiet voice. Her eyes were dry. 'Would you like to stay here with me for a while?'

I want you. Desperately. I don't care if you love me or not. Don't care at all. 

The sky can't change, for me. I can only… cry…

She's out there but I can't leave this place. I can't reach her. Not even if I kill her daughter. Not even if I kill myself. I would call you but I have no voice. I would touch you but I'm not able to catch you.

[A fading voice, so far away…]

So please, please… remember me...

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